I Caaaan't Heeear You!

Listen.

Listen carefully.

What is it about listening that is so difficult?

Listening to another; listening to yourself; listening to your inner-self; listening to God.

It often seems that we think because we hear ourselves or another that we are listening. I am not so certain that we can really hear until we begin to listen—and we cannot listen until we become present. In order to truly hear we must first be willing and able to listen; and to listen we must first become present.

How many times have you talked to someone; perhaps attempted to pour your heart out, and you could tell that the person with whom you are speaking is not really hearing you; not really listening for he/she has already began to offer advice or found a “fix” for your situation or has decided he/she already knows your story? This person is not present to you.

I had someone tell me the other day that he questioned if he still believed in God. He wasn’t looking for “answers”; he was looking for someone to be present to his process; to give him space to be with his questions—to listen. There’s nothing more violating to a person than to offer advice when what one needs is to be listened to. Advice is often a form of control. Judging one's "process"; thinking I know is a form of control. It is all about me, and if it's all about me, there's no space for you. I’ve sat in countless hospital rooms as patients are dying; I have discovered that often I “hear” the most; I listen more attentively, when there hasn’t been a word spoken.

It works the same way with oneself and God.

In order for me to hear God, I must first become present, and willing to listen. This usually requires silence on my part; removed from the distractions of my thoughts and “processes”. This is not always easy and requires practice. As my dear spirituality professor taught me in my Contemplative Listening class, I need to learn to “bracket” my thoughts and experiences in order to be present to another; the same can be said about me and God.

I have found that it is not always the “words” that I “hear” that demonstrates my ability to listen, but being present to the feelings, pain, or joy beneath the words; giving “space” to the words. As I sit in sacred space and bracket the noise in my head, I discover that I "hear" much less, but “listen” a great deal more. I suspect when I think I am hearing; there’s probably a good chance that I am not listening. If I think I “know” what your saying, or have made-up my mind “where your headed” then mostly likely I am not listening.

I have found this to be true while meditating on sacred scripture. Being present to the text creates space for the small, still voice beneath the words; I find myself listening, and as I listen, I can hear God speak. The same is true for others and myself.

Ever felt like telling God like Sargeant Carter to Gomer Pyle, "I caaaaan't heeear you!"

If I don't hear from God, it could be because I'm not listening.