The "sinner" in my mirror.
The sin in my mirror.
I recall the Thanksgiving a few years ago my wife and I participated in an event where we fed over 2,000 people. In preparing, we assembled several teams of people who would work various shifts throughout the day. One of the teams consisted of a client and several of his employees that we managed for him. This particular client was very rich and at the same time, very greedy. Perhaps one of the greediest persons I have ever met.
He had promised to work two two-hour shifts. About one hour into his first shift he alerted me that he and the crew were "heading back to the office." At that moment I lost all respect for this person. I burned with anger and truly wanted to take him "outback" and have a man-to-man talk. This guy irritated me; I ridiculed him—all of which fueled my contempt for him.
Sharing this story with a pastor friend one day, I made mention of how of all people I’ve ever met, "this client" really needed to get out there and give back a little. I shared about my anger and contempt and how I’d love to give this greedy prick what he had coming to him. My friend turned to me and said, "So, you like ministering to the drug addicts and the homeless; standing up for social justice, but your client is the "sinner" you don’t like. That’s okay, we all have one. The rich, greedy person is the sinner you don’t like."
I felt like some one had yanked the covers off me and I was naked! About that time Jesus showed-up—only this Jesus looked a little different than a Palestinian Jesus or a rosy-cheeked Jesus in the suburbs... no, this Jesus looked just like my client.
As I stood there with a rock in one hand and a sword in the other shouting "Crucify! Crucify!"
Jesus looked and me... and guess what he said? "Get behind me Satan you are a stumbling block!" And then Jesus gazed toward the heavens and said, "Father forgive him for he knows not what he does."
Is there a "sinner" you hate? In Romans 14, Paul instructed the church on how to live with one another. He knew that we could not live in community and have our attention focused on what we perceive to be the weaknesses of our brothers and sisters.
Ever wonder why we judge people? I think it has to do with fear. Somewhere deep inside us lies a fear, and if I can make you the enemy, then I don’t have to face my fear. If I can find a way to blame you then I don’t have to accept those things about myself that I don’t like.
Judging others gives me a perception of power. Power gives me a false sense of control, and control gives me security, which can give me a false sense of superiority. And if I am superior to you then I don’t have to face myself. If I can make you the enemy then I don’t have to love you and I can drop bombs on you.
Fortunately, that isn’t the way of Christ. Remember Jesus’ words, "Neither do I condemn you." He was able to incarnate God’s grace and express it because of his amazing self-acceptance. Perhaps Paul knew that the way to transformation wasn’t in contempt for others, but in focusing on ourselves and our own weakness and brokeness and to let God be God.
I read the following sometime ago... sorry I don't know who wrote it: "grace is the instrument of healing and growth and it was demonstrated by Jesus’ ability to accept the rejected and love the hard-to-love person. That healthy religion build bridges, strengthens trust, and stimulates inner freedom. Healthy religion encourages a person to accept him or herself, as he or she is—imperfect, sinful, and finite—and then to forge ahead. "
And our religion cannot and will not be healthy until we accept our brother and sisters who are weaker, put the focus on ourselves and work out our salvation with fear and trembling by trusting God to be God in our individual selves and the lives of others.
5 Comments:
Is there a sinner you don't like - those are powerful words, that I am sure I will be thinking about, and trying to unravel in my own thought today. I was in a conversation once with someone who believed that there were levels of sin (of course non of which they had the highest level of) and it gave them the 'right' to judge, look down upon and not love others, regardless even if they were 'christian' or not. For me, I had such a hard time forgiving and loving (the way I am supposed to) a person who had really hurt me, I thought that surely, their sin was really bad, where mine was not as bad.
Since, I have worked on forgiveness and humility. Two things, that are not so easy - at least for me. Thanks for making me think a little more about humility, and a little less about myself.
Ah, Rick...the truth is that the sinner I really, *really* don't like is the one staring me back in the mirror. I know him, and his past, far too well...and there are days when it's really hard to see him as God's kid, instead of just the spawn of Satan he can be.
And let's face it, if anyone else had done to me what *I* have done to me, I'd have killed the son of a bitch - without blinking an eye.
So self-forgiveness - and to obey the command of Jethro, in "The Prince of Egypt," to "look at your life through Heaven's eyes," is the order of the day. Thanks for bringing that knowledge to light this day.
This can be a real eye-opening lesson and a real ass-kicker to boot (pun intended). When or if we ever allow ourselves to journey to the end of ourselves in the search of transparency, the bountiful forests that adorn our eyes tend to become all too apparent.
I know for myself, that everytime I manage to raise my voice in criticism of another or the church in general that the very action(s) that are the root of my disdain have been made manifest in my own walk all the while. The beauty of all this is that my motivation is not to clean up the ugliness in my own life just so I can freely trash another, but that I can better relate given the opportunity, because I'm there, have been there or am going back there.
Maybe it really does take 1 to know 1?
in confessed this exact same thing at group the other night. i'd take a down and out person any day over a self-righteous prig. i despise those who wear the mask and look down their noses. it just frosts me. i have no love, no patience, no grace for them. if they admitted their issues i'd be there in a minute by their side, but the false bravado and image they project, man, it's all i can do not to wipe their noses in it. god help me please... i'm surrounded by them... argh!
Yep, I don't like to be manipulated. It doesn't have to be someone mean or nasty. When I feel trapped in a verbal maneuver, it stirs something really unholy in me.
But, the question is, how do I love this person/these people? How do I go from fear/hate/disgust to agape?
I've found that to love the people I have the most difficulty loving, I have to cultivate my relationship with God more. I need to pray for them, and thus develop a respect for them that is based in Christ.
But, that exercise is hard, and I'm inconsistent. Grace. Whew.
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