You are Invited to the Party.

S.H.A.M.E.: Should Have Already Mastered Everything

Shame hurts. It touches us in the depth of our soul. It tells us that at our core that we are not okay. It tells us that we should be perfect and have mastered everything in our journey in life.

Shame causes one to beat-up on himself or herself. Shame is the excuse to hate ourselves over who we perceive ourselves to be. A lot of times it comes from other people who have not managed to heal from their shame so they pass it on to others.

I was with a friend of a family member tonight who is feeling some intense shame. I am afraid she’ll being carrying it a while. I see her soul pain over a decision she made, and now she questions herself... her humanity... her value as a person.

Shame comes from the root word meaning to cover. Shame makes one feel disgraced, less than, wanting to cover who he or she is. Do you want to cover?

I once heard someone say that God loves us with a love we did not earn and therefore we can never lose. We don’t earn God’s love… God loves us because that is who God is. Shame comes from not knowing who we are as God’s beloved. Henri Nouwen says that we have to remind ourselves every day that we are God’s chosen ones.

I think of the story of the woman caught in adultery and on the verge of being stoned to death. Jesus says those who have never felt shame… those who have never hurt so deeply in their soul that they missed God’s best… those who have never longed to recognize who they are as one of God’s beloved and therefore have fallen short of God’s best… those who have never sinned, go ahead and throw the first stone.

We can’t throw rocks at one another. We cannot stone ourselves. We need each other to remind ourselves of who we are so we won’t be tempted to put on a mask and cover ourselves or hide from who God created us to be.

Jesus, by his very existence, reminds us of who we are as children of God. God, who comes to restore us to our full humanity, reminds us that we don’t have to hide or cover our shame. Jesus reminds us that God sees that we are good… that we have worth regardless of what the world says about us. Jesus reminds us that we are loved with a love we did not earn and cannot ever lose. That's why I like Jesus, he claimed God's love and acceptance for all those on the outside... those feeling shame. He welcomed them at the banquet feast. He welcomed me at the banquest feast. He welcomes you... and he welcomes my new friend. We are all invited to God's party, not because of who we say we are but because of who the Host says we are.