The Space to See.

"It is in deep solitude that I find the gentleness with which I can truly love my brothers. The more solitary I am the more affection I have for them…. Solitude and silence teach me to love my brothers for what they are, not for what they say." Thomas Merton

Those last words really nailed me, "Solitude and silence teach me to love my brothers for what they are, not for what they say."
Working as a hospital chaplain provided me an opportunity to practice compassion. Compassion essentially means to suffer with. What I have discovered is that I am fairly decent at acting compassionate toward a total stranger who is suffering as a result of something like cancer or some other disease.

But what about those who are close to me who may be suffering from a soul sickness? I must admit I have often treated those close to me with less patience and compassion than I have total strangers. It is as though I know those close to me and so I focus on what they say rather than who and what they are.

And my patience and compassion are directly linked to my acceptance. Most of my trouble comes when I am unwilling to take a moment to look into the heart of another. I think one of the reasons I have a beautiful marriage and fall in love with my wife more with each passing day is that we have been blessed with seeing into each other’s hearts.

Solitude allows me the space to truly move past what I hear and enter into a place where I can see into the soul of another. I can see past their words and into their heart. And when I look into their heart I see that I am no different.

When I am impatient and not acting compassionate and there it is a good chance that I need to spend some time alone with God. Where God thankfully loves me for what I am not for what I say.